OT: just a joke...

[Thomas P.]

Here it is:

Heisenberg driving on the highway and the cops stop him. One of them asks him:"Do you know how fast you've been driving?" And Heisenberg answeres:"No, but I know where I am!"

[Chris R]

i don't get it.

[petemoore]

Cher, on a way to one of her concerts was exceeding the 45mph speed limit by 40mph.
 Cop stops her and asks why she was in such a hurry...
 She said: "Im on the way to a sold out show ... and Im late"...
 The cops asks her: "Do you know 'how fast you were driving?"'
 She said no...but if you hum a few bars I can Fake it !!!

[bwanasonic]

i don't get it.

http://www.aip.org/history/heisenberg/p08.htm

Kerry M

[RDV]

amindisaterriblething

sdrager

VDR

[Thomas P.]

Hey Kerry, great link!!!

[Mark Hammer]

I got the joke immediately (cute, too!), but man, talk about an inside joke.  If that was a baseball pitch, it'd be so inside you'd have to stick your stomach out to avoid getting hit in the back! :wink:

[Ansil]

I got the joke immediately (cute, too!), but man, talk about an inside joke.  If that was a baseball pitch, it'd be so inside you'd have to stick your stomach out to avoid getting hit in the back! :wink:

good analogy mark.

high brow humor for diy.

winston churchhill says

madam would you have intercourse with me for 1000$
why yes she replys.

would you have intercourse with me for 5000$
why yes she replys.
would you have intercourse with me for 5$
what kind of woman do you think i am?

that madam has already been established we are now trying to set a price.... lol..

[bwanasonic]

Hey Kerry, great link!!!

Thank google :wink:

Kerry M

[gez]

If that was a baseball pitch, it'd be so inside you'd have to stick your stomach out to avoid getting hit in the back! :wink:

Now THAT'S an inside joke! (coming from a nation that doesn't play baseball).  

[jsleep]

I didn't get it either without the link (thanks).

My favorite Winston Churchill story (sorry if I don't get it exact quotes):

He gets in an elevator with a woman who is a political rival, he's intoxicated.  The woman says something like "Mr. Churchill, you are drunk!" and he says, something like "Yes, I am, but in the morning, I'll be sober and you'll still be ugly".

JD

[Kilby]

Just to join in.

To set the scene, Groucho Marx is pruning the roses in his front garden when a middle aged couple approach him.

Man: Sir I would deem it a hreat honour if you would insult my wife.

Groucho: If I had a wife like that I wouldn't need somebody else to insult her.

Well I liked it anyway...

[Bill_F]

Another good one from Winston Churchill, when a lady of renown told him.

"Sir if I were married to you I would put poison in your tea".

In which he replied.

"Madam, if I were married to you I'd drink it."

[gez]

I like the story of how elephants got their name.  Apparently, when the British first went into India one of the Rajahs held a celebration in their honour and put on a display.  So as not too offend, he ordered that the animal’s hind quarters were to be bound with cloth to catch any unfortunate ‘accidents’.  Unfortunately they weren’t used to performing in these restricting garments and the display was rather poor.  The Rajah, extremely embarrassed, turned to one of the British dignitaries who, unfortunately, was hard of hearing and said “I’m so sorry about the beasts, but they’re HELL IN PANTS!”

True story! (made up by myself…but true)

[Paul Perry (Frostwave)]

here's my favorite, so long as we're OT:

Speaking of John Wilkes, a reformer, and fellow rake:

Sandwich: "You will die either on the gallows or of the pox."
Wilkes: "That must depend on whether I embrace your lordship's principles or your mistress."

(yes, THE Sandwich, the guy who invented the sanger.. someone had to)

[afranks]

Or for those with a more theological bent:

What did the Presbyterian say when he fell down the stairs?

"Wow... I'm glad that's over with!"

[Paul Perry (Frostwave)]

"Predestinarianism, sometimes called “theological
determinism,” is the doctrine that from all eternity God
has foreordained everything that happens. It has influ-
enced Christian historiography, although most Chris-
tian historians have accepted Saint Augustine's view,
in De civitate Dei, that divine revelation has to do
with the fortunes of the heavenly rather than of the
earthly city."
- a gloss to the falling down stairs joke.
I'm afraid my taste in theological falling down stairs jokes is more of the "what is black & white & black & white & black and white" kind.