Electronic Joke of the Day

[stringsthings]

 Heinrich was in the lab one day ... and he had just built a Super-Duper-Tube-like Screamer ( with the ultra-rare IN$$$ Germanium Diodes ) to go with his new Les Paul and Marshall stack ... when he applied power and strummed the requisite "E5" power-chord, he forgot to turn the volume controls down on the pedal and the amp - and he promptly blew all the speakers in his cab  .... when GuitarWorld interviewed Heinrich about his experience, he calmly replied,

"This new pedal really has a lot of gain, but blowing the speakers really Hertz!"

[SpufuZ]

 

[deadastronaut]

 

[jasperoosthoek]

Say watt? Worst joke ever

[Gurner]

Firstly....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i3HXefD41wI

followed by....

[deadastronaut]

O

@gurner.
i like the rabbit with the pancake...very disturbing, but in a good way..lol...

[petemoore]

 It exceeds the maximum ratings.
 Wait, isn't that AC applied to DC circuit ?..politically incorrect too.

  Feedback loop blows speaker = Hertz Donut = hurts...don't it?].

[nick d]

                    .....Got to be one about picked up by the FUZZ in here somewhere...(NOT from me!!)

[PRR]

Heinrich Hertz laid the foundation for ball-bearings and other point-contact mechanics.

He was an assistant to Helmholtz, another giant of our field.

He also piddled with radio waves. For a while they were called Hertzian waves.

Asked about the ramifications of his discoveries, Hertz replied,

"Nothing, I guess."

His discoveries would later be more fully understood by others and be part of the new "wireless age". In bulk, Hertz' experiments explain reflection, refraction, polarization, interference, and velocity of electric waves.

When you tune to A = 440 Hz you honor Hertz's name.

[ayayay!]

You're just a bunch of tranny lovers.

...especially you BC109 sickos. 

[Nasse]

Archimedes, Pascal and Newton were at Archimedes´s summer cottage having "boy´s evening" and they decided to play hide and seek. Archimedes was first to seek while other hide themselves. Pascal hide himself under a rowboat. But Newton just went to the sandy beach at the lake, draw a square on the sand and stood inside the square.

- 100! I´m coming shouted Archimedes and opened his eyes. Immediately he saw Newton standing on the beach. -I saw you, Newton!

-Wrong! I am Pascal, a Newton on square meter is Pascal!


Here´s another animal oriented

A panda goes into a bar and grill and orders a sandwich. As soon as he finishes the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter dead. The panda then gets up to leave when the bartender shouts at him, ""Where do you think you're going? You can't just order a meal, kill the waiter, and then walk right out of here like that!""

The panda gives dictionary to the bartender and he looks up ""panda.""

Panda - n. A large marsupial native to south eastern Asia with distinctive black and white markings. Eats shoots and leaves.

[petemoore]

When you tune to A = 440 Hz you honor Hertz's name.
   Megahertz.

[sundgist]

A panda goes into a bar and grill and orders a sandwich. As soon as he finishes the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter dead. The panda then gets up to leave when the bartender shouts at him, ""Where do you think you're going? You can't just order a meal, kill the waiter, and then walk right out of here like that!""

The panda gives dictionary to the bartender and he looks up ""panda.""

Panda - n. A large marsupial native to south eastern Asia with distinctive black and white markings. Eats shoots and leaves.

Panda goes on a date with a young lady. They end up at her place, she cooks a lovely dinner, they end up in bed. Post coitus the panda gets up and starts to make his exit. The young lady starts to complain. Panda hands dictionary to young lady.

Punchline as above....

[edvard]

Resistance may be futile, but capacitance has potential.

Scientists may come, and scientists may go, butAmpere's name will always be current.

[Scruffie]

Well i'm glad I put a stop to all this sillyness.

And Oh...

Panda goes on a date with a young lady. They end up at her place, she cooks a lovely dinner, they end up in bed. Post coitus the panda gets up and starts to make his exit. The young lady starts to complain. Panda hands dictionary to young lady.

Punchline as above....

[jkokura]

Resistance may be futile, but capacitance has potential.

Scientists may come, and scientists may go, butAmpere's name will always be current.

These ones made me laugh sooooooooo hard!

Jacob

[stringsthings]

A panda goes into a bar and grill and orders a sandwich. As soon as he finishes the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter dead. The panda then gets up to leave when the bartender shouts at him, ""Where do you think you're going? You can't just order a meal, kill the waiter, and then walk right out of here like that!""

The panda gives dictionary to the bartender and he looks up ""panda.""

Panda - n. A large marsupial native to south eastern Asia with distinctive black and white markings. Eats shoots and leaves.

ROTFLMAO ! 

[G. Hoffman]

Panda - n. A large marsupial native to south eastern Asia with distinctive black and white markings. Eats, shoots, and leaves.

Fixed.

Its a punctuation joke.  The way you had it written is grammatically correct, but the commas make it mean what you need it to mean.  The joke is that the books editors were idiots.  {Sorry, but I learned punctuation from a book that used that joke as its title (Eats, Shoots & Leaves: The Zero Tolerance Approach to Punctuation, by Lynne Truss - great book, a very entertaining read).}

My dorkiest jokes?

There are only 10 types of people in the world; those who understand binary, and those who don't.

{...and...}

Why do mathematicians always get Halloween and Christmas confused?  Because Oct 31 and Dec 25 are the same number!


Most of the people I know don't get either of those jokes, I'm afraid.  


Gabriel

[edvard]

Why do mathematicians always get Halloween and Christmas confused?  Because Oct 31 and Dec 25 are the same number!

(Note: The following is my lame attempt at a pedal-cloning-specific edit of a joke that's been around the Internet for a while. My apologies to the original authors.)

Yogi Berra Explains DIY Pedal Building

Interviewer: What do you expect is in store for the future of building one's own effects pedals?

Yogi: I'm thinkin' there'll be a group of guys who've never met talkin' about it all the time.

Interviewer: Can you explain why people would clone popular pedals?

Yogi: I can't, but I will. 90% of all cloning is half improvisation, even with op-amps. The other half is the parts builders use while others are using parts they never heard of because someone said it sounded good. So if you use the wrong part, its right. If you use the right part, it might be right if you use it wrong enough. But if you build it too right, it's wrong.

Interviewer: I don't understand.

Yogi: Anyone who understands building pedals knows that you can't understand it. It's too complicated. That's whats so simple about it.

Interviewer: Do you understand it?

Yogi: No. That's why I can explain it. If I understood it, I wouldn't know anything about it.

Interviewer: Are there any great pedal builders alive today?

Yogi: No. All the great pedal builders alive today are dead. Except for the ones that are still alive. But so many of them are dead, that the ones that are still alive are dying to be like the ones that are dead. Some would kill for it.

Interviewer: What is a 'Burst Box'?

Yogi: That's when the effect that you should hear now happens either before or after you hear it. With a Burst Box, you don't hear the effect when it happens because that would be some other type of pedal. Other types of pedals can be used as a Burst Box, but only if they're the same as something different from those other kinds.

Interviewer: Now I really don't understand.

Yogi: I haven't taught you enough for you to not understand pedal building that well.